Well, there's only a few weeks of summer left. I'm ready for school this year. Some of that is just excitement, but some of that, also, is a let's get this first day over with attitude. Why? Well, here are my concerns.
I'm really nervous about friends. You know my situation right now, God, and You know what I fear with my friends this year - especially on the first day. I'm nervous about how we will all react to each other. Nervous about my faith, again, since last year was hard. No one gets it, God. I don't know why, but a lot of times I just feel so alone at school. Thank You for carrying me through, though, and thank You for a loving, supportive family. That's all I need, really, and I pray that when I get frustrated, You remind me of that.
School is hard. This generation is a hard one, invaded by social media and what not. All the sports stuff. The ridiculous relationships with boys. It's hard. It's hard to do the right thing sometimes, but it is so worth it.
This school year, God, I get to go out for sports. I'm excited, but in the back of my mind, I'm worried too. This time it's not just if I'll die running cross country. You know how the world is with sports, God, and I've written blog posts about it too. It's mainly basketball I'm worried about - not being good enough, ranked as lesser, and on and on, so please give me peace. Because I know in the end it will be okay, You will see me through.
A ton of kids are just plain ecstatic for friends and sports and such, but it's different for me, God. Because of my faith, it makes everything harder. I wouldn't trade that for anything, though. You've provided all the time, God, and I wouldn't trade what you've done with this blog and my writing and just the maturity you've given me over the years, for anything. I'm not going to ever compromise that just to make more friends or whatever.
I talk about the world being hard, God, and You're the one who gets me through it time after time. Really, though: I'm excited, God. This fall will be fun. At school, please help me to focus on what I am there for: education. And please remind me to count my blessings at home, too.
This fall, God, I know You're going to help me in my writing too. You've helped me so much with my book, and I'm done editing now which means I just have to do some finalizing touches. Thank You, God.
This summer I have really realized what is important, God. In sixth grade, I wasted so much time and energy focusing on shallow things. I realized I don't need those, and in seventh grade, those shallow things will be brought up again. Please help me to look ahead, like my devotionals say, so I don't get off track. My relationship with You. My family. My education. My writing. That is what needs my attention, not the things of this world. This year, God, please help me to not just focus on that, but show how it benefits me. In other words, please help me to be a light this year.
I'm not perfect, and I don't have half of what I need to figured out, but I know You're going to use me, God. You're going to use me to share Jesus. I mean, this summer I got lots of comments on social media from people who read my blog and like it. More people than I thought - some I wouldn't have expected to even read it.
I never regret letting You be in control of my life, God. I never wish things were easier, because if they were, I wouldn't be who I am today. I learned a lot this summer, God, and I'll learn a lot this school year. Thank You, God, for never giving up on me and for sending Jesus. Thank You for my family, and I could just go on.
I love You, God. I can't wait for all the adventures and crazy stuff You're going to do through me and with me this year.
Your daughter, Ashlee