Before we dive into today’s post, I want to thank everyone who has submitted blog post requests through my social media stories! It’s great to get ideas from all of you on what to write about because then I know exactly what you want to read. I got some ideas for future faith and advice posts I’ll be writing in the weeks to come, but for now, there’s a topic I want to touch on since I’ve noticed a lot of Christian ministries and books are geared towards adults. That topic is the importance of giving God your youth and how to do that in a world where youths are encouraged to do anything but.

As a young Christian, I’ve noticed a lot of things throughout my life about this. It seems like less and less people my age are going to church, and when they are, I’m a little disturbed by how elitist and shallow many of the churches attracting them seem. As young people seem to be relying less on God and faith, I’m worried that those who want to are being taught Christianity as it appeals to them. There can be so much emphasis on attracting the lost that people are willing to compromise core values of the Christian faith and God Himself to make it more “appealing” and “marketable.” To be serious, then, about recognizing God as He is and not as the world and culture would like Him to be can be really isolating, but there is nothing more beautiful and rewarding than seeing Him for Who He is.

I want to write a post that shares not just my experiences of being a young, serious Christian but also truths from His Word about other young people He called and what He taught them. I feel like with many Christian testimonies, people get saved as they age and mature, usually after doing all the wrong things, and this post is certainly not intended to make those people feel bad if they did not give God their youth. What I am trying to do is help young people see why surrendering to God as early as possible is what they should do—what we are made for.

What Does It Mean to “Give God Your Youth”?

This may sound like a complicated or peculiar concept if you’ve never heard of it before, but all it means is that you ask Him to save you and become Lord of your life when you’re young. It means that instead of making your own interests your priority and whatever the world says you should be doing as a young person, you instead choose to live for God and do what He wants you to do. You’re still a normal, healthy person with similar desires and needs as everyone else, but rather than focusing on the culture and how it says you should fulfill those things, you turn to God and His Word. In short, you go about your life and whatever seasons it consists of—school, sports, extracurriculars, hobbies, social engagements, etc.—with Him at the center, looking to glorify Him through your choices rather than the world.

Why Does It Matter?

The biggest decision of your life is whether you accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior or not. We all meet Him someday, and we will either go to heaven to be with Him forever or hell and be separated from Him forever. And this decision doesn’t just affect your soul after death. It permeates every aspect of how you live your life now—how you think and view the world, how you behave and treat other people, the choices you make, what you choose to focus on, and what is most important to you. God is our Creator, the maker of the universe and of every single one of us. Nobody knows us like He does—or what’s best for us. To not surrender to Him completely and scorn His ways only ends in personal destruction.

I feel a huge need to educate other people my age on so many moral issues and social problems in accordance with God’s Word. I am taking a course on human sexuality this semester—I know, laugh at me, but I actually wanted to because I’ve always been interested in relationships, marriage, sex, and how to make all of those things as good as possible to honor God, others, and myself. This course does NOT teach you that. Oh, it thinks it does, in the name of “sex positivity,” which means you only ever validate any choice anyone ever makes as long as it’s “consensual.” They may say there are some circumstances where you shouldn’t be doing something, but why? Why pass judgment on anything with this sort of mindset? If people are doing what they want, what else matters?

How about the fact that doing what you want is hardly ever what you need?! That our feelings and flimsy ideas of what we think are so fickle at any given moment in time? The textbook I am reading will destroy people’s souls if they take what it says to heart. A life without boundaries and “moralistic messaging” is a life of insanity, excessiveness, and dysfunction. And yet most people are willingly eating up any cultural message presented by anyone considered authoritative.

Sometimes, even when I talk to other girls who theoretically love God, I feel like they don’t get this. I feel like they are all too eager to absorb the messages culture says about Christians—that the biggest sin you could ever commit is to judge someone. Spoiler alert: IT’S NOT. Don’t ever let anyone convince you that the most loving thing you could do for another person is validate whatever they want to do. I’ve heard from people much older than me and people my age how they’ve done things when they were younger they regret, that caused them grief and made their lives harder. I have stories of that in my life, too, which is why I want to talk about the importance of this. Here are a few reasons why giving God your youth matters…

1. How you live matters now.

Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.

1 Timothy 4:12 NIV

This verse is so empowering for young people and shows the legitimacy you have as a believer in Christ even when you’re young. This letter was written by Paul to Timothy, his younger mentee he was counseling on how to shepherd and lead the church. We tend to think the wisest Christians are older, and a lot of times, they are, but it doesn’t mean you can’t also cultivate wisdom NOW when you’re young. If you start now, think about what God can do through you as you age!

When I got connected to the church I go to now, I used to go to the adult Bible study group with my mom because after trying several youth groups, I just wanted to go somewhere where I could dive in as deeply as I wanted to and be surrounded by people I knew cared about God and living for Him completely. They were gracious enough to let me come when I was only 13, and the way they poured into me while being so encouraging and complimentary of the spiritual progress I was making empowered me like nothing else. They were an encouragement to me, and I was also an encouragement to them because you probably know how much older people love to see younger well-behaved people. You have the chance to inspire them as you learn from them!

2. God created you, calls you, and wants you to follow His plans now.

The word of the Lord came to me, saying,

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
    before you were born I set you apart;
    I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

“Alas, Sovereign Lord,” I said, “I do not know how to speak; I am too young.”

But the Lord said to me, “Do not say, ‘I am too young.’ You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you,” declares the Lord.

Jeremiah 1:4-8 NIV

This passage is titled “The Calling of Jeremiah,” and if you know anything about him, you’ll know he experienced a lot of hardships in his life, and his book was not shy about recording them. He was a prophet called by God at a young age to turn Israel from their rebellious ways, but he was scorned most of the time by those he was trying to reach. Nevertheless, God encouraged Him with His good plans (Jeremiah 29:11), and this passage provides a beautiful look into how God thinks about His children. He knew us before He even formed us!! Of course, Jeremiah was worried about his youthfulness when God called him, but the Lord rebuked him for it, seeking his obedience and trust, and encouraged him not to be afraid of the people God was calling him to reach. This is a model of how we should live as young Christians in a culture that despises us today.

3. Life gets hard. Set your foundation now.

Remember your Creator
    in the days of your youth,
before the days of trouble come
    and the years approach when you will say,
    “I find no pleasure in them”—

Ecclesiastes 12:1 NIV

We’ve all probably been told either cynically or jokingly by older people how life doesn’t get any better than it is right now. Well, it’s a mindset. Every season has its highs and lows, but there can be a special joyfulness and innocence to childhood. It is supposed to be a simpler time. It breaks my heart if you haven’t had that experience, and believe me, my childhood wasn’t perfect, but again, it’s a mindset. If you grew up in chaos, you can learn to create an environment and attitude of stability. That being said, childhood is seen as simpler and more joyful because you have less responsibilities and you haven’t had as much of a chance to be corrupted by the world, so you’re more of your most natural, best self. Whether you’re 12 or 22, though, you can set the foundation for joyful years to come.

It all comes down to focusing on Him.

4. The more you endure now, the better prepared you’ll be.

It is good for a man to bear the yoke
    while he is young.

Lamentations 3:27

This can also give you hope if your childhood hasn’t been that easy. God can use the difficult things we go through to develop our character and hope, which lasts forever (Romans 5:3-5). Lamentations is another Old Testament book that I believe was also written by Jeremiah and expanded more on his discouragement and pain. Nevertheless, he wrote that it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord (in verse 26) and bear the yoke when young. I can’t even begin to express how grateful I am now looking back at the loneliness and discouragement I felt through high school. It was good for me to “fight with God,” wrestle with my beliefs, and fight for them nonetheless. I have unshakable confidence now. I’m a much more resilient person than I was back then, and I learned that I can survive difficult, painful seasons. Best of all, I learned that God is trustworthy, that He’s always with me, and that He works all things for good.

5. The world doesn’t care about your best interests. Jesus does because He made you.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 NIV

My campus ministry just covered this passage in our study a few weeks ago, and even though I’ve been familiar with it for a long time, it dawned on me again how countercultural Jesus’s calling on our lives is. He calls us to rest with Him, not work for the world. The world is going to tell you all these things you need to do and be, either to sell to you, manipulate you, or sometimes thinking they’re helping you but really they’re not. Only God knows what our souls need.

6. We must come to God like a child.

And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 18:3 NIV

This verse quotes Jesus saying no one can enter the kingdom of heaven without becoming like a child. This shows the importance of the first and third reasons I gave you about the importance of giving God your youth. Setting a foundation now helps us know the way home when we get lost. Children are so trusting and innocent. That is why Jesus makes this comparison. We have to come to Him with their level of genuine, humble faith. The world tries to eradicate this in us, especially in the west where materialism dominates our culture and education (this is not just referring to the materialism of things but the theory that only what is measurable is real).

I wrote a post about meditating on a blog post draft I wrote when I was a little kid and how it inspired me in a season where I was cynical and depressed a lot. You can inspire yourself with the faith you have when you’re young. So many of us grow out of it or decide we’ve got better, more relevant (so we think) things to focus on when we get older. Then we spend our whole lives finding out we were wrong.

Don’t underestimate how precious your life is to God. He doesn’t call you for control or self-centeredness; it’s the complete opposite. He calls you to come to Him now because He so selflessly loves you despite any and all of your sins, and He KNOWS what’s best for you because He knew you before He even made you!! Don’t wait on Him when you can have Him now and experience the joys in His presence forevermore starting NOW (Psalm 16:11). The world says you’ll be happier if you fixate on grades, getting money, having tons of friends, having a relationship, and the list goes on, but Psalm 16:11 says in HIS presence you’ll experience the fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11). Don’t waste your time chasing everything else only to realize He’s been waiting for you to surrender to Him all along. You can read Ecclesiastes if you’re curious what it’s like to receive everything the world has to offer and where that will get you psychologically.

Now, I want to spend the second half of this post focusing on the practical: how to actually give God your youth. We might think if we just go to church or say we believe in Him, we’ve given Him our youth, but it’s not about a series of actions you take; it’s about cultivating an entire lifestyle built around your relationship with Him.

How to Give God Your Youth

1. Let Him in.

First off, if you haven’t been saved, recognize Him as Lord of lords. Realize that Jesus came to earth and died the death He did to save you from your sins and was resurrected, breaking the stronghold of sin and death and setting you free from the hold sin has on your life. You can read more about becoming a Christian here.

2. Guard your heart in His Word.

How can a young person stay on the path of purity?
    By living according to your word.

Psalm 119:9 NIV

This verse spells out the recipe for purity and a relationship with God perfectly! When I think about how I would overcome things, be encouraged, and still renew my mind now, it was absolutely in His Word. I’ve read the entire Bible through quite a few times now, and I’m working my way through it again. I look for slightly different things every time, kind of like the process of revising my book, except I’m not reading it to revise the Bible; it’s revising me. Every time I read through it, it makes it easier and more alive the next time. 2 Timothy 3:16 says this is how we’re corrected and trained in righteousness. This is how God speaks to us. We all tend to say we want to hear from Him or wish we could, but how many of us have even read His letter to us from cover to cover? How many of us are in it regularly at all? Look, I get it, life is busy and it can be daunting, but you’ve got to choose what and Who you want. The world can fill your time, or you can choose to carve out time with God.

Blessed is the one
    who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
    or sit in the company of mockers,
but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
    and who meditates on his law day and night.
That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
    which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
    whatever they do prospers.

Psalm 1:1-3 NIV

I wanted to split this passage in two and save some of the verses for a point to come, but we can go over it now because I think it shows the power of His Word and its importance in staying in fellowship with God. Obviously, peer pressure is a MAJOR temptation young people face, and this verse provides excellent advice on that we’ll address a bit further in the points to come. It also shows you will be blessed if you delight in God’s Word. Again, the more you read it, the more verses you will be able to understand and record and memorize and therefore meditate on. As you have conversations with God, He might start bringing those passages back to you to communicate with you.

3. Flee youthful passions.

Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

2 Timothy 2:22 NIV

It’s probably also no surprise that many of the desires associated with being young are evil. In verse 23, Paul lists stupid arguments as one of those evil desires. I think this could also be referring to the overall self-centeredness young people can have. We look out for ourselves first, expect to be catered to, tend to make decisions based on impulse and what is best for us based on our emotions, argue with others and want to prove we’re right, etc. These are temptations that are always prevalent but tend to be especially exaggerated in young people who haven’t had the years to mature as much yet. I’m sure you can remember a ton of cringeworthy things you did when you were young; I know I can. It’s probably safe to say that what most of your friends and peers are doing or behaving like, you should be seeking the opposite, unless you’re surrounded by peers/friends with the same desire to pursue God as you.

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV

This is an important verse to remember and meditate on. When you’re young, there are so many forms of temptation, usually in the form of peer pressure or your own desires. Remember that God always provides you a way out. My advice from years of resisting and at times giving into temptation is that as soon as you feel tempted, talk to God about it right away and put as many obstacles between you and the temptation’s path. Heed those warnings He gives you in your spirit when you know something may not be good for you.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Romans 12:2 NIV

I love this verse because it definitely was something that defined my childhood. The world, your friends and peers, and maybe even parents and teachers are all going to have ideas about what you should be thinking, and if these people are godly influences, that’s great, but ultimately, we have to seek God’s will for our life and make His voice the loudest. The easiest way to do this is to be in His Word and read devotions or helpful books to help you grow in your understanding of Him.

4. Seek Him with your whole heart.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Jeremiah 29:13 NIV

This may seem like a redundant point or like “duh,” but how often are we actually seeking God with our whole hearts? Especially when you’re growing up, you have so many things to think about—school, work, friends, sports, clubs, etc., and that’s not counting other things that occupy our attention, like social media, looking attractive, our own hobbies and interests. Growing up in this culture, we thrive on distractions. Some of this is outside of our control and I get that, but chances are, there are some things you can swap out for more time with God. You may not be able to prevent homework, but you can definitely reduce the amount of time you spend on your phone and social media—and this would improve your mental health, too. God knows your heart even when you are legitimately busy, but you can also ask Him for ways you can seek Him more and examine your routine to see what you can cut to spend more time with Him. It is true that what you consume is what you’ll begin to think like, so when it comes to social media, try to set boundaries like doing your Bible study before looking at your phone. That’s something I still do now.

5. Learn how to die to yourself.

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

James 3:16 NIV

One of the things I’ve struggled with most throughout my life and that has caused me to act immaturely the most is due to jealousy and envy. Especially with how we tend to think nowadays, we’re encouraged to be ambitious, usually for our own sakes. There’s nothing wrong with being ambitious and having goals and dreams, but I’ve discussed at length the problems associated with that when it becomes the primary way of thinking. If you’re a Christian for any length of time, one of the phrases you might hear commonly includes “dying to yourself,” which also sounds strange, and there are a lot of misconceptions that can be taught with it. It means dying to the sinful desires we have or the sinful striving for good desires we have. It doesn’t mean hating ourselves and never considering our needs and desires but that we view the world through obedience to God and love for others and trust Him to meet our needs. This is something we are on a lifelong journey doing as Christians, but if you can learn to cultivate this now, when you’re young and when that’s the last thing on many of your peers’ minds, you’ll be that much further ahead.

It might not always feel like it, since what you’re probably going to see and be told is how you should take care of yourself no matter what, but it will take so many burdens off of you to submit to God fully and have Him show you what you need. When you gain confidence through Him, you’ll be free from so many of the worldly temptations that are so enslaving, like making posts for attention on social media, trying to receive validation from the opposite sex, or obsessing over achievements.

Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.

Mark 8:34 NIV

I love this call from Jesus because even though it’s difficult to swallow and live out at times, it’s actually liberating and life-giving. I’m going to share the following verses at the end of the post when I share a little bit of my story and experience with this. What Jesus is saying here is that there’s a life you can make with the world, and there’s a life you can make surrendered to Him. I would say life is harder when you choose Him, but I don’t know if that’s completely true—I saw this excellent quote one time that said you have to choose your hard, like for example, working out and eating right is hard, but being overweight and dealing with the health struggles that come along with it is also hard. It’s easier not to worry about the former, but it’ll be much harder to face the consequences with the latter. I think the same is true with God. It’s hard to battle the temptation to “keep up with the Jones’s” and make a great life for yourself focusing on all your needs and desires versus surrendering to God, who calls you to think less of yourself (not putting yourself down, but literally thinking less of you and more of Him), and keep following Him even when it looks like other people are having easier lives or more success. The rewards you get when you’re abiding in Him or the consequences you’ll face for not following Him are far more than any worldly offerings.

6. Choose your influencers carefully.

My son, if sinful men entice you,
    do not give in to them.

Proverbs 1:10 NIV

You’ll notice that a lot of these headings/tips are applicable for anyone at any season in their Christian walk, but I think these are important pieces of advice to begin taking to heart and following when you’re young especially. I know that when you’re young, your friends are very important. I didn’t have a lot of friends as I grew up or ones that I really clicked with, so I can’t relate to this as much, which I think in some ways was actually a blessing, because I do know the pressure to impress people you really like and not seem like the odd one out can be paralyzing. Rather than doing everything you can to avoid those feelings when you’re young, embrace them. Seriously, the earlier you can learn to live with uncomfortable feelings and find confidence that isn’t dependent on other people, the more content and powerful you will be. No one likes to be left out, but my point in saying this is that a lot of things young people do aren’t healthy or helpful in the long run at all. If you’re feeling tempted or pressured by your friends to do things you don’t want to do or know aren’t good, you may want to reconsider your friends, especially if they can’t be respectful of your choices.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—“so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

Ephesians 6:1-3 NIV

I don’t know everyone’s parents, so I definitely realize that not all parents are healthy, godly, or good. Even with parents who are, everyone is still sinful and dysfunctional to different degrees. This means that no parent, obviously, is perfect, and the same is true with people in authority or elderly people. However, in general, I think it is important to heed the advice and boundaries of parents, teachers, and other authoritative people in your life. Many people want to help and are trying to look out for your best interests, even if they don’t always do so in the best ways. As we’ve talked about earlier, the biggest thing is to focus on and know the voice of God. As you do so, and as His Holy Spirit lives in you and ministers to you, you will be better able to discern messages that are from Him and those that aren’t. The same is true for people. One of the best skills you can learn is when to take advice and when to let advice go, and the filter by which to view it all is through His Word. The reason for this is because a lot of adults, as mentioned earlier, learn things the hard way, and they genuinely want you to avoid the pitfalls of bad choices you can make when you’re younger. The temptation is to blow them off and only live for the moment, but don’t. You don’t realize how much you’ll have to reap later in life for bad choices that felt really good in the moment. Older people do because they are living it.

In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,

“God opposes the proud
    but shows favor to the humble.”

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

1 Peter 5:5-9 NIV

I LOVE these verses from 1 Peter because they sum up the points I’m trying to make much more eloquently, and there are a lot of beautiful things to take away from this passage. Humility is one of the best things you can cultivate when you’re young. Remember that God gives His favor to those who are humble, so you can’t be trying to puff yourself up and serve Him at the same time. Let HIM exalt you—and I love that this says “in due time”! I know I’ve felt mad at God because I can feel overlooked a lot as I’m NOT competing with my peers for attention, and many times, it does look like they’re more confident and getting more praise. BUT…it is not the praise or actions that honor Him. Wait for what He has for you. He always gives good things to those who wait, and that may be one of the most crucial lessons you can learn when you’re young and the temptation is to experience everything—including bad things!

I also love how it says to stay alert. It’s easy to be aloof when you’re young, but keep your mind focused on Him. It is so sad how many young people are so utterly lost before they even reach age 18 in this society. The devil is definitely at work and loves easy targets. Take heart that all of us face those temptations and root yourself in God, who will empower you regardless of your age and weaknesses.

“Now then, my children, listen to me;
    blessed are those who keep my ways.
Listen to my instruction and be wise;
    do not disregard it.

Proverbs 8:32-33 NIV

I’ll leave it at this!

7. Pray and spend time with God ALL the time.

“Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

Matthew 26:41 NIV

There are so many good verses in the Bible about praying continually, and I wanted to share this one because it ties into the conversation about resisting temptation and the devil. It is so true that many people want to live for God, but very few people actually live set-apart lives for Him. It is difficult. You will learn just how opposed the culture is to it once you become committed to it. You have to learn to enjoy the intimacy that comes with talking to God constantly. You don’t have to pray that you’ll avoid temptation all the time, but that is a good thing to pray; you can pray about anything and everything. Enjoy having fellowship with Him because it’s love, not rules or religion, that motivates you to live a life of obedience to Him. That’s what changes your heart. Just tell Him your thoughts with whatever you’re doing and whatever He lays on your mind. That will help get you into the habit of filtering everything through Him.

8. Don’t be afraid of the challenges that come with this.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

2 Timothy 1:7 NIV

I realize all of this can sound intimidating when you’re new to the idea of a relationship with God or if you know there’s more you should be doing. It can also seem scary when you think about how it’s not the most popular thing, but don’t be overwhelmed by it. Just take it one day at a time. You’ll make mistakes, but that’s part of growing—both as a person and in your relationship with God.

Do not remember the sins of my youth
    and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
    for you, Lord, are good.

Psalm 25:7 NIV

This is one of the verses I wanted to end with, too, to show that you’re going to make mistakes and fall into sin, but whether you accept Jesus into your life when you’re young or not, remember that it’s because of the Lord’s great love that He forgives you!

My Story

I’ve written this blog since I was 11 years old, so if you’ve been following for any length of that time, you probably know most of my story. I wanted to reiterate how thankful I am that God saved me and has been with me since I was young. You can experience His blessings and redemption no matter what age you are, but I’m thankful that there are a lot of things I’m learning now that have helped save me from other sinful patterns.

In middle school, specifically at the beginning, I struggled with wanting to be popular through sports because at the time, that is what was considered cool. I used to compare myself on social media all the time and to this group of girls in my grade that a lot of people seemed to refer to as the “sporty girls,” and they seemed like the popular girls of my grade. I was jealous of the way they seemed to carry themselves with such confidence and how they seemed to receive a lot of attention from people in older grades and from lots of guys. I was pretty shy and serious from a young age, but I could and still can be very playful and wanted to have fun, too.

However, I’d surrendered my life to God shortly before middle school, and what I wanted more than anything was to live a life for Him. I knew it wasn’t the most popular thing to do, though. A lot of girls would say they loved God on social media but weren’t living lives that looked like He was on their minds at all. As I matured, it was painful to realize my type of personality and values didn’t attract a lot of peer attention. I wasn’t a flirt or someone who would put myself out there for attention. Even in sports, I didn’t like to be super aggressive because I wasn’t arrogant or intense about a game. But I would constantly see how girls who weren’t shy or timid got a lot of attention.

I never felt like I fit into a stereotypical friend group. Even today, I have a hard time thinking about what group I would’ve put myself with. I think my interests and hobbies, being more worldly in nature (not necessarily sinful but things like fashion, fitness, etc.), actually would have fit more with the sporty kids, but sports weren’t my life and I never clicked with those girls, and in hindsight, I’m glad I didn’t because it’s really important to me to stand out for God. I always tried being nice to everyone, but I definitely didn’t want it to look like I was part of a clique and groupthink. I started owning the fact that I had different priorities than my peers, and it made me proud even though it was lonely because I felt like even in just a small way, I was sharing in Christ’s sufferings and being marked for Him (Romans 8:17).

Some of the friends I’d been hanging onto for years and I parted ways. The friends I had were usually very different from me. We’d have common goals or some shared interests, but it always seemed like fundamentally, in terms of our values and beliefs, we were different. I don’t have a problem with that if we can still be respectful of one another, but I reached a point where even being surrounded by people, I felt so lonely. I had all these people, yet they had no clue or interest in what I was most passionate about: God.

I started distancing myself from a lot of my friends toward the end of middle school. Sometimes it felt worse to be around people and hear how far they were from God than to just be on my own completely. Eventually, that’s what happened. I outgrew some relationships and others distanced themselves as they became more involved in sports and I decided not to be. When I was in eighth grade, I was almost completely alone except for some girls I still sat by at lunch and a wonderful older “mentor” I had from the high school. I actually look back at this year, though, and think that as emotional as I could be, it was one of the sweetest times in my relationship with God because I really poured into my church, family, and writing, and I had a hunger for God and was reading all these Christian nonfiction books and my Bible more than ever. It was definitely a time of great spiritual growth and confidence in my identity in Him that I wouldn’t have gotten otherwise.

In high school, I got more jaded and began doubting and wrestling with God a lot more. People thought I would have friends in high school, but that never happened because I didn’t get involved with anything, and all the groups were pretty well set. Plus, I didn’t want to try to do things just to meet people when I knew how a lot of my peers were. But it hurt. I felt like I missed a lot of high school milestones, and I did struggle with resentment when I felt like I was doing all the right things but watching everyone else have fun.

It took till almost the end of high school for me to finally start making peace with it, and sometimes when I would come home from college during my first year, I would feel the hurt all over again. However, as I got into college more, I ended up seeing a lot of the flip side with girls I was around—like the consequences that come from indulging in sin. I also gradually started meeting more people and being in situations I’d always wondered about, like bars/party atmospheres. I haven’t been to the bars in Ames yet and I didn’t go anywhere underage, but when I worked in Okoboji for two summers, especially the second summer in marketing, I hung out around a lot of bars and on party cruises for social media content. I began realizing I hadn’t missed out on much and that God really had been protecting me from a lot. I also started seeing the beauty of my life and being content with how I was raised.

College made me busy, which I wasn’t at all through high school. When I was busy, I thought that’s what I always wanted, but I actually really missed the intimacy I had with God when it felt like just Him and me a lot through high school. I’d also seriously go back and slap myself for complaining about being bored because I feel like I NEVER have free time anymore, and I hate that, but you don’t know what you don’t know. Meeting people in college now who are still struggling or just beginning to figure out some of the things I learned in high school made me incredibly humbled and grateful to realize I have developed confidence in who I am as a child of God. There are still things that upset me and times where I’m tempted to doubt God, but during that time in high school, I journaled and fought with Him so much that I eventually started learning from all my mistakes and dysfunctional thinking. It takes time to grow and be sanctified, but it is SO true that the more time you spend with Him, you will grow, and it’s a beautiful thing to watch His santification inside you because it does lead to the most peace and joy.

My Favorite Verse On Giving God Your Youth

For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his Father’s glory with the holy angels.”

Mark 8:35-38 NIV

I love this passage even though it’s not specifically said for surrendering to God as a young person; it’s about surrendering to Him at any point. However, I think it was especially relevant to me as I was growing up being serious about my faith. As a young person, you’re obsessed with gaining the whole world—you have your whole life ahead of you. It’s easy to think about how you can make a life all about you, especially in the world of Instagram where everyone can compare to everyone. Plus, I know a lot of young people scoff at the idea of God because they think they have better things to focus on when they’re young, taking it for granted that He’ll always be there, or they give Him about 50% or 25% or 10% of their attention but still want to keep up their popularity, attention-seeking, and worldliness. Focusing on anything more than God will hurt your soul, and if you’re trying to keep your life as you want it in the world, you will lose it.

And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.

Matthew 19:29 NIV

This is another verse where Jesus talks about being rewarded for following Him and how He graciously makes up for anything we lose for following Him. Jesus is greater than anything you might miss out on when following Him! He is Who we’re made for, and your life will make so much more sense when you have that relationship front and center.